Chocolate & Chilli Scones

Following the guidelines re plain scones (useful for beginner bakers) sieve 8 ounces of self raising flour with a teaspoon of baking powder and rub in 2 ounces of butter until it resembles breadcrumbs.

Mix in an ounce of sugar and 20 grams of chocolate chips or chunks.

Measure out 100 mls of cold milk and add a pea sized drop of Scorpion Psycho Juice stirring it really well. By stirring it I don’t mean getting huffy about the name of the chilli sauce. I know the guy who invented Psycho Juice and if there was a slur on mental health I’d have chopped his genitals off and used them as Christmas decorations.

Mix into the dry ingredients and then tip out on to a floured board shaping into a rectangular shape by rolling gently with a rolling pin until they’re about an inch thick. I cut them in to triangles but use cutters if you wish. Brush with milk then bake 180 (fan oven) for 8 – 10 minutes, cool on a rack.